Let's talk about body hair, shall we?
We all have it.
We all grow it. Whether we want to or not. It's there.
So why is it bad?
Why did I grow up thinking the hair that naturally grows on my body is bad? Gross? Ugly?
My armpits, legs, belly, and pubic area becoming covered in hair during puberty--Naturally--is somehow shameful, weird, and completely unmentionable.
JUST SHAVE IT. NAIR IT. WAX IT. PLUCK IT! Whatever you do, don't allow it to be seen. Just get rid of it.
Why did I think that to be acceptable. To be pretty. Sexy. Wanted. Liked. Or adored. Meant I had to rid myself of "unsightly" body hair?
Well when I was about 11 or 12 years old I went to a water park with my mom and my grandma. Grandma came out of the dressing room and headed to the park with us, I noticed curly dark hair poking out of the leg holes of her bikini bottoms. Thinking it wasn't supposed to be there, I notified her that it was indeed sticking out. Instead of telling me that a natural lady bush is totally acceptable to wear to a water park in the 90's and to mind my own business, or even educate me why she chooses not to shave, my dear grandmother was embarrassed. Shamed to let her natural pubic hair show through her suit enough so that she went back into the dressing room and put on her shorts.
That moment has stuck with me for literally 20 years. I honestly feel sort of bad about it because I pointed out something to my grandma about herself that she maybe wasn't ashamed of before I pointed it out. That obviously wasn't my intention, and I may be making too big of a deal out of it. But it should come as no surprise to you that shame over natural body hair was passed down to me. That's how lots of shame and fear is passed down. Through stories that are lived out and passed down through generations. Well that fucking story is stopping with me, friends.
I am the proud owner of natural armpits, hairy ass legs, and a full grown natural lady bush.
My youngest daughter, age 10, is embarrassed of my hair. She isn't quite as proud as I am of the hair that grows naturally on my body.
We have a Florida vacation this month and she is BEGGING me to shave it. She even went so far as to tell me that God wants me to shave it off. IDK where the fuck she got that idea.
It does suck a little that she's embarrassed by me, but I sure as hell hope that when she's given the choice to shave or not shave her intimate body parts, or make any choice about her body, that she makes an empowered and informed decision. I hope that she chooses to do what feels right for her body and her life. And I hope she's damn proud of it.